The Rubicon is that moment when a child feels they are no longer a little child (they have grown up and something within them has changed), but is frightened by the prospect of growing older, because of all that venturing out into the world entails. It can be a time of great inner turmoil. And the emotions that can arise from this are varied and intense. Around 49 BC, Julius Caesar was returning to Rome at the head of his troops following his victorious campaign in Gaul. However, Roman law forbade generals from entering Italy with their armies; they were required to disband their forces before crossing the border, which ran along the River Rubicon, on pain of death. Caesar was aware of this law; and, tormented by doubts, he decided to cross the Rubicon, knowing full well that this act would mean civil war against Rome’s consuls at the time. According to tradition, Caesar uttered the famous phrase ‘Alea jacta est’ (the die is cast) as he prepared to cross the river with his troops, signalling that there was no turning back after that act. He had no choice but to face the inevitable consequences. Civil war did indeed break out and ended in Caesar’s victory.
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